The 10 Worst Movies of 2016

Send help, I have a cold. A big, stinky cold that won’t go away, no matter how many oranges I eat that I can’t even taste. A lady asked me for ID today when I bought some cold medicine at the supermarket, and let me tell you, I am well over the required age of 16. She wasn’t impressed when I handed her my car key as proof of age. Get a sense of humour lady, and get out of my way before my nose drips on you!

So, whilst I’m feeling grumpy I thought today would be the perfect day to hate on what I think have been the worst movies of 2016. Like I mentioned in yesterdays 10 Best Movies of 201610 Best Movies of 2016 post, I haven’t seen anywhere near all the releases, and I’ve consciously stayed away from some movies I’ve heard were terrible!

As always, I go by UK release date, which generally causes a lot of confusion. For me too, so don’t worry. I’m giving Suicide Squad a generous pass, because I’m a sucker for the soundtrack, and as much as Daddy’s Home bored me, the last 15 minutes kind of made up for it. Other than those, I think I avoided a lot of stinkers this year. Let’s do this!

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#10 Sausage Party

I nearly didn’t watch Sausage Party at all, because the trailer wasn’t funny and anything with James Franco’s name on it is an instant turn off for me. Sadly, my love of animation got the better of me, and I gave it a go. I’ll admit this, the opening is hilarious, the song was catchy and funny, and the first few jokes were so outrageous that I did that half gasp, half laugh thing, but after that the rest just bored me.

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#9 How to Be Single

Oh, how I wanted to love this movie. Such a wonderful cast. A beautiful setting. It wasn’t aimed at married me of course (I was engaged at the time) or my very un-single friends that I saw this with, but it fell so short of the mark. Why did the main girls never all meet up at any point? What was the deal with Damon Wayans Jr’s sorrowful yet completely out of place plot line? Sigh!

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#8 Batman v Superman: Dawn of Justice

I’m not just jumping on the DC hate wagon here, I swear. Batman v Superman earns it’s spot on this list because other than ‘MARTHA’, the only thing I can even remember about this movie is me shuffling around in my cinema seat because it was just so darn long. Anyway, wasn’t the whole thing just an advert for the Justice League movie(s?) anyway? Let’s face it, I’m still going to watch them.

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#7 Independence Day: Resurgence

Brexit caused two movie related things to happen in the UK in 2016. One was that The Purge: Election Year got pushed back so many times (for fear we would repeat it?) that I eventually forgot it existed, and still haven’t seen it. The other was that Independence Day: Resurgence did amazingly well at the box office, I guess because Nigel Farage declared we were going to name July (June?) the something our own Independence Day. *facepalm*.

Oh yes – the movie! Um, it was kinda boring. Someone punched an alien in the face. That was cool, if not slightly familiar.

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#6 Mike & Dave Need Wedding Dates

After winding down from my own wedding last year I was really looking forward to watching a wedding related movie without it causing a panic attack or near meltdown at the very thought of planning a seating chart. This cast should have created something perfect, and I have nothing to say other than ‘YAAAAAAS’ for the musical number at the end, but I’m pretty sure I took a nap for the rest of this movie.

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#5 High-Rise

Thanks (but no thanks!) to blogger Mettel Ray for reminding me High-Rise existed! Apart from a shot of Tom Hiddleston’s naked butt, there was absolutely nothing to like about this movie. I think it was one of those artsy movies making a statement about something, only I’m not sure what that was. Probably that living in a high-rise with it’s own supermarket is not a good idea.

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#4 Wiener-Dog

The second sausage related movie in this list! Also, most likely the second artsy kind of movie that I just ‘didn’t get’. All I took away from Wiener-Dog was several stories about terrible people mis-treating a beautiful doggo, who deserves much better than to live in this cruel, cruel world.

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#3 Sharknado 4: The 4th Awakens

Let me get this straight. I LOVE Sharknado. I also enjoyed Sharknado 2: The Second One. That was back when they were super low budget movies that were terrible because they were cheaply made, filled with continuity errors and bad editing. Now, it feels like they’re actually trying, and it’s just not fun anymore.

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#2 The Boss

I find Melissa McCarthy so hit and miss. As a supporting actress, she’s hilarious and often steals the show, but as the lead she just comes across as obnoxious to me. The Boss could have been a half decent comedy with a heart warming story, but the inclusion of Peter Dinklage’s character just turned the whole movie stupid, and not funny at all.

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#1 Get a Job

It took 4 years for Get a Job to be published after it was made in 2012. That should say enough really, but if you’re still curious let me continue. It starts off so promising, mentioning how as children we have everything given to us on a silver platter and then one day, BAM. Go out into the wild, get yourself a job and become a grown up. It’s like that Twenty One Pilots song, Stressed Out. So many plots get thrown in that none ever get a satisfying closure, and seemingly Alison Brie is only there to make sexual innuendos and collecting a paycheck at the end of the day.

Well, I feel so much better getting that all off my chest! What did you think the worst movie of 2016 was? Just so I can avoid it!

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33 thoughts on “The 10 Worst Movies of 2016

  1. 4/10 from your list and agree with all of them. Sausage Party got tiring fast. I thought I would enjoy a raunchy animated movie but turns out, no. BvS was a disappointment. It could have stuck into one narrative but it felt like five different movies at once. That Martha thing was anticlimatic.

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  2. Hey Allie! Boy am I glad I’ve avoided all of these, except for BVS which I agree is shiat!

    I have no interest in seeing any of them, esp Sausage Party, ugh. As for High Rise, I was tempted to see it as it’s on Netflix, but I have a hunch I won’t like it. I’m just gonna wait for FREE FIRE which also has a great mostly-Brit cast by Ben Wheatley [hint: Sam Riley is in it] 😉

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  3. I have 3 of them on my worst list as well. Manage to miss a few of them. I started trying to watch High Rise but turned it off just couldn’t get into it!

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  4. Nice list! I thought the very same thing with How To Be Single – Rebel and Leslie Mann completely disappear from Dakota’s storyline halfway through. It’s such a hot mess movie but the ending almost saves it for me. 😛

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  5. High Rise is so bad. I don’t think I even finished it. The music and the look of the movie were OK but I found it to be a pretentious mess, kinda like Nocturnal Animals but at least that one had Shannon’s performance going for it

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  6. Ugh! Some stinkers on there and several I’m thankful to have missed. I still stand by BvS but some of these are absolutely abysmal. I know she’s loved by many, but I’ve had more than my fill of Melissa McCarthy!

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  7. When I read other people’s best of list…I tend to have only seen like two or three of the films. But your Worst-of list? All but TWO.

    I’m with most of these, but being that I watch a lot of shit, my list would be waaaay different. As far as mainstream stuff? You nailed it. Most of these are unfunny comedies that should have been a million times better. I’ve never even heard of Get a Job.

    Maybe I should check that one out?

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    • I’m the same way usually! Somehow I feel drawn to watch crap movies, but they’re always more fun to write about!
      Please, please watch Get a Job, because I just know your post would be hilarious. I have no idea what would be in the Yays column though!

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  8. I agree with the ones I watched on here and I think I’d agree with the others as well as soon as I’ve seen them. 2016 was not a completely cinematically pleasing year (I don’t think that is even a word 🙂 )

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  9. Sausage Party just seemed like a waste of everyones time, although I found myself laughing a lot throughout. I’d much rather see the team make another movie like This is the End than a forgettable animated feature :\ Nice post!

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  10. The ones i have seen i would agree on apart from BVS i found it disappointing but final judgment for me will come after Wonder Woman and Justice League. I also found Sharknado 4 bad this year.

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  11. Yes! I love “Worst” lists. I keep thinking about doing a bottom ten as well as top ten each year but I get SO bitchy in my reviews of movies I hate that I don’t want people to think I’m way too negative. Or something. But bad movies seriously piss me off. ; ) Those crazy UK release dates! I’m happy to say I’ve seen NONE of these films other than Sausage Party. I didn’t “hate” it but I was expecting to get WAY more laughs out of it. It was just…. Not good. Disappointing. Otherwise, I mostly avoid watching comedies at all these days as there are so rarely any good ones. As your list proves. : ) Damn – I’ve been wanting to see High-Rise, though…

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    • Lists like this get difficult, especially when there’s a movie where you feel like the only person in the world who hated it!
      Don’t let me put you off High-Rise though, I hated on it in my previous blog and quite a few people tried to explain to me the meaning behind it all. Didn’t help me in the slightest, I still hated it, but you might enjoy it?!?

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  12. Sad to see Get a Job at the top of your worst list and at only 5% on Rotten Tomatoes. The reason I say sad is I remember enjoying Dylan Kidd’s previous Roger Dodger (2002).

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    • Ooh I haven’t seen Roger Dodger, I’ll check it out. There are a lot of problems with Get a Job, it sat on a shelf for 4 years before being released, and the story it all over the place. It’s a shame because it had great potential!

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  13. I was so excited for Sausage Party just b/c I thought the concept was really smart. I didn’t care about the jokes, but that one scene from the trailer where all the food items are caught in an explosion of flour, and it looks like a war zone? That was an intense visual, and I wanted to see the movie just for that. But pssh, not worth it for the subpar jokes.

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